came back from cell group.. had a nice chat with liXia on th way home. We actually took the right bus but the wrong direction home. we ended up in AMK. instead of sengKang. we were so engrossed talkin that we didnt realise at all. hah. So we decided to take a cab back home instead.

Cell was over at jy's place..familar places.. familar faces... kind of like it used to be.. just a smaller group. Really refreshing though. kind of made me missed the good times we had. Thinking of what was broken that needed to be fixed. That if i was something people were trying to fix.. that if i was letting friends and family worry about me.. thinking about old friends.. thinking about new friends.. thinking about money and how overrated it is.. thinking about the beauty of things around me and the things i've missed out in life.. things that i said in the past... things i didnt say.. thinking about the people i havent met.. thinking about cheese cake and a good cuppa coffee.. the things that i wanna try cooking.. the things that i want to try.. about my diving trip.. deep sea fishing...

thinking why am i thinking so much.. nvm me..

i'm hungry.. how am i gonna pass this lonely night without food, beer and company. ha. how else.. just sleep it off i guess. like i always do. Good thing i've got Lisa Ono with me tonight. thanks Lisa.

*i feel nice like sugar and spice! so nice so nice i got you! *

Cough Blood

yawn... sat morning again. so tired that i slept like a log last night. yawn.. i'm still not awake yet.

my groggy eye lead me to my bathroom where i splashed cool water on my face to wake myself up while i was wondering where is my brother and mummy. hmm. unusual that they didnt wake me up.

felt something in my throat.. tried to cough it out. I spat it out and it was blood! ha.. now i'm awake. i looked at my hands and i realised that they were all covered in blood. Looked at myself in the mirror to find myself having a nose bleed.. chey.. tot i was coughing blood.. so it was only blood back flowed in my throat when i was sleeping. boring. It was messy though.. good thing i didnt dirty the bed with my nose bleed.. or i'll be kicking myself clearing up and washing the bedsheets. ha

Been a really long and busy week.. just back from 2 weeks of off and leave and they worked us like dogs.. projects kept coming in and trials after trials.. furthermore i still had to complete my assignments to be handed in during the week! it was crazy.. when my buddies finished work they were resting.. me? i jus carried on and do my assignment. i wake up at 630.. but i sleep at 2 plus3 am. i'm glad that at least the assignments are out of the way.

Really tough working and studying.. especially in my unit. I'm already takin one module less per semester but i'm still feeling that it's taking up too much of my time. Well.. what to do... made my choice. i should thank God that i still have the capacity to put myself into sch.

Sch aside.. starting to feel unsatisfied at work. Dun find the deserved recognition for the work that i put in.. been telling alot of ppl that i'm about to leave the organisation. That's the fact.. but my OC has been telling me to keep hush on that.. afraid that it'll affect my ranking in the coming year. I guessing i should be running in the top few positions in terms of ranking.. not tat i'm proud or anything.. but i pretty sure that in the place where ppl are under performing, the average performer could actually fly pretty high. And i could safely say that the only competition to those position are my buddies in my company.

then again.. it's not important about these ranking.. there's no difference in terms of benefits if was to come in first or second.. only more work. You doing well so you work more!! work till you're under performing then someone else will take the work. HUH? stupid system. Capable people do more... lazy people do less. but they get the same in return. bravo!

the thought of leaving led me to seriously consider what i want to do when i get out. Been offered a few options already. but i still want to start my own business ultimately. Having failed terribly in my last venture, its surged my thirst for more. ha.

i know why that venture fail.. and i regret it had to turn out like tat. lost a little money(really just a little). paid for a really valuable lesson. i doubt it's really a good idea to do business with friends. so much tat is so hard to say to each other. things that dun make business sense but you had to keep quiet afraid to affect the friendship. It's a really sucky feeling when you know that ppl wants you out and sugar coat their intentions. especially when it's coming from a friend. well.. i guess it's a good thing that it's ended too.

But just for the record, i never once doubt the potential of this company, never once doubt the quality of my partners and never once tot that the partnership would come to and end like this. Hope you guys will carry on to do well in your own private ventures eh.

though i know my commitment has been minimal, it has really been a highlight in my life.

ok ok.. think i better go catch some lunch before my mum or brother come home to find me dead on my laptop with my hands shafting paper in my mouth to curb my hunger! ha.

Durains tonight.. hmm. how unusual.

Mid Autum Fun with the kids!!

Had a weird and tiring night.. no doubt a wonderful time at vikki's place on Saturday night.
i guess it was meant to be be get together bbq after dunno how many donkey years. Aloy and estee was there..GuoQing came too.. Lots of ppl.. But i didnt really feel like mingling.. probably too tired after a whole afternoon doin STATS! Stupid stats! ha.

Ended up i went to relief some stress by spending time with the kids. Brought them to the play ground.. telling them nonsensical stories that made no sense to me(they made me tell stories.. so i told them glen kor kor tripped and fell over his armpit hair.. they actually tot it was funny.. haha).. playing pesi cola 123! (lost every single match to the Quek brothers!! ).. taking photos and teaching them to take photos! haha. so much fun.

Jacob boy was a terror!! goin around pulling ppl's shirt with that baby face of his!! almost ripped my shirt off too! hah. the quek brothers almost slammed my camera on the floor while fighting over it..(most of the shots below are taken by them!!) Rachael taking the slide dunno how many donkey times that even i got tired of watching her go up and down again. ha.

but the highlight of the day was when karen ran and give me a big hug out of nowhere! haha. so cute and chubby. Wat a day.. washes the stress away.. brings in a whole new batch of aches and pains in my back carrying them all night. ha.

Raphael.. my fav little boy!!









The Quek brothers in KungFu Poses! and they took the photos by themselves for each other! not bad rite!


















Grace's naughty "boyfriend". ha












Raphael again :)













Tabael in another KungFu pose. ha










how could i forget my little princess Rachael!

waiver's over! :)

done with my waiver exam yesterday! ha. i think i haven't written so much stuff for years!! my hand is still aching from all the writing.. too much of typing already. ha ha.

well.. was actually quite scary going for an exam unprepared. it's a waiver exam, which means if i pass the exam without taking the lesson, i'll be exempted from taking the module.. which also translate that i save money and i say time!

but then again... whoever said it was easy to pass something you know nothing off. :(

actually, that's not entirely true.. the subject is Effective Communications. The hard part is in not knowing what is expected of my answers in terms of academics. Not that i couldn't answer the questions.. i just don't know if i answered them the way they wanted.

Thank God that i was a History, Lit and Econs student before! even though that was really a long time ago (6-7 years in fact), my short stint of writing essays every day then came in really handy today.

Eventually, i wrote 8 pages of rubbish i give up.. i not hoping for a good score, cos all i need is to pass to not take the module. hee. but part of me already told myself to prepare for failure.. just in case. ha. well.. not many ppl passes the first time ok.. if i really do pass.. it'll must be God's grace! :)

well well.. it's over.. dun wanna think about it.. still got 2 more reports due.. plus 2 more video presentations also due next week!!! sianz.

That is not including work yet.. sianz.. how did i get myself so busy!!?? tat's my choice i guess. :X

Sanfranz!!! You.. you...ruined my blogging appetite!!! argh!!!

I'm on leave!!! hmm.. or 5 more days till i get back to work. The glass is half filled and half empty. so?

By right, i should have been very excited about the end of Army Open House and start posting stuff about it. But i didnt. not that i didnt want to.. but i just didnt. Not that there's nothing that i want to remember from it.. but i just didnt.

why wait till now? i have no idea.. i think that indian guy from India really threw me way off.. pissed me so much that i have lost the appetite to blog anything at all.

so before i tell you about AOH, i wanna bitch about that Indian guy who still gets on my nerves when i think about him!! (mind me for the language. ha)

AOH ended last mon night.. it was great. but one thing really hung at the back of my head. I had a project dateline on Tues might. worst of all.. it was a group project. Really had to apologize to the rest of my project group that i was really too tied up to give them any of my stuff before hand. I had to complete the designs.. write out the design brief. that was about it. i told myself that the work i almost done.. and i'll be able to finish it on tues afternoon. and i did.

rushed to sch from work tue evening.. walked into my class where they were already there.. including sarfranz<---- the indian guy. He was there looking at me with dagger eyes. As if i killed his family or something. Then he asked me a question.. rhetorical or was it sarcasm.. i couldnt tell then. he asked how i was doing. i was like "huh?". He knows i've been busy.. asking me tat question in tat tone and that eyes.. i dun know how to reply him. But i said i was fine.

within mins i and him were into and argument with him lecturing me about time management and that i should have done my work earlier (when he only finished his end of stuff 2 days ago!!!).

i know.. i should have stayed up late like 2 or 3 am to do up my stuff and wake up at 630 again for work. but i didnt.. cos i know i wouldnt make it thru AOH like that.but it's not like my work wasnt up to standard.. and he lecturing me those time management bullshit is not gonna help with anything at all! "..so will ya shut up?! " i was thinking.

didnt want to quarrel with him.. i jus kept quiet doin my stuff while the rest of my teammates look thru my work. The rest of them were ok.. but he wasnt satisfied. Give me the i could have done better look. (i really dun understand.. i'm the designer guy and he's the networking guy.. how could he have done any better when dun even know wat design elements are?!) I remember he insisted that i copied my design from SONY for the advert when i design the whole ad by scratch. i even checked that the original SONY ads are totally different.. but he feels that it's too professionally done to be my work! wat crap!!!

the whole night.. he was jus up against me. watever i did was not good enough when he didnt even read the stuff that i do. Let's say the design brief.. he didnt understand wat a design brief was and then he insisted on findin it out from the text book. i told him i should know was a design brief is because of my professional training.. but he refuse to believe me as wat i told him didnt match the text book. (the text book had absolutly NOTHING about design brief!!! It was a marketing book for GOd's sake!! not a design book!!) He insisted that all the answers should come from the text book. So he grabbed the closest thing to a design brief.. components of an advert. ???????????

we consulted with the lecturer as we couldnt come to consensus. She like my work apparently. He kept quiet when she was around. Once she's gone.. he said he'll continue to do it his style!!! "i think we'll still stick to the text book.. you cant be wrong following the text book" he says! argh!!!!.. stubborn mule!!! dunno whether to laugh or cry!!! ha.

it's all wrong.. he simply ignored the good work that i did when he really didnt even bother to look at my stuff. He still got the cheek to ask me to contribute when he got stuck with the work. i was fuming mad!! it's been some time since i raised my voice.. i told him..:"Apparently you havent read the stuff i wrote.. the answers are all there!!! if you just want to follow the stupid text book then what for you wanna get a tertiary education!"

i was serious.. industrial experience counts for nothing in his thick skull if it aint in the text book. then he might as well jus go buy some books and read it at home! why you need an education for? so that you continue to lose your reasoning abilities and just follow the TEXT BOOK!?? Text books, especially marketing ones, are merely are written by man who writes based on experience. situation changes and alot of things are arguable. but not too him.. the text book is the word of God!!!

i cant stand him!!!

thank God the group assignment is over and i havent killed him yet. I most definitely had the intention to! ha.

No relevance..jus wanna get it off my chest. phew.. i'm really feeling better. think i finally could continue to post other stuff already.ha

anyway.. tml's my waiver exam for effective comms. havent written an essay in years.. hopeful i'll be able to make the mark. if not i wouldnt be able to waive that module.. :( not expecting to pass though.. jus gonna try. all the best daniel.

AOH posting..?? another day perhaps. yawn. Remind me nver to group with Indians from India ever again.